I Think I Can...I Think I Can... Hey, Four Dollars!

For those of you keeping track, there are 39 more days until I fly out of here.


The gravity of my embarkment hasn't quite caught up with me, but I think I can feel it pulling me in a little more each day. I took the prayer time of church today to think about what all I had to do in preparation for January 3. I have payments to arrange, checks to write, goodbyes that have to occur, and tons of time that I need to spend with my friends and family.

The anxiety grew when I saw the email telling me that my final payment is due in a few weeks. I sat down a few days ago and budgeted everything out, and I'm still short. And I don't mean short as in, $20 short, I'm talking like...$4G kind of short. Eating is overrated, so I didn't even include that into the mix, but since a movie costs $20 in Sydney, I'm not anticipating a cheap box of Cheerios either...

The worst part is that I feel I'm running out of options. It has been hard enough asking for help from loving members in the church community, but when I realize how much more I have to go, I get overwhelmed. The scholarships that I'm waiting to hear back from won't even be announced until the end of December or into January. Sorry kids, but I'll be halfway around the world when you finally decide if I need the money or not...

Everything comes gradually and at its appointed hour.

-Ovid 

I love my family though. I told my father this afternoon, "Dad, in about two weeks...I need $4,000." His response was simply, "Ok." No hesitation, no forethought. He then asked the exact day it was due and the current date, and he said, "We can do it, don't worry about it. There's no sense in worrying over something you can't control." That is where my father and I differ. He leaves some things to fate, and I believe that you can control anything and everything. If something goes wrong, it isn't fate's fault, it's our fault.

After dinner at Montelongo's tonight, my father really wanted some Gummy Worms... don't ask. He also bought four scratch-offs; one for each of us. They were the Elvis ones, so when we chose the one we wanted, the only difference was his facial expression. I picked the one of him just staring at the gambler, no real emotion, basically saying, "Yeah, as if you've got a winner in your hand." I joked saying, "Maybe I'll win $4,000 on this and then I can move on." My mother, sister, and father all scratched for nothing. I took my turn at emotionless Elvis and, ironically enough, won 1/1000 of what I thought I would.

Everything works itself out, and this will too. Some things are better left to fate. I'm just a little edgy because I wish fate worked itself out a month ago.

Here Comes the Crescendo...

I have nothing Australia related to put in today's blog, but I do have a message I want to relay to any of you who are taking the time to read this...

Today, according to the church calendar, is the day we celebrate All Saints' Day. It is a day to remember those we have lost in this life, and to be thankful they are in a better place. The usual names pop up every year, grandparents, great-grandparents, older church members. But it seems this year has been hard on the youth. In the past 4 months two LHS graduates, both very bright young ladies, have been taken from this earth. One had just spent a year in the Army Reserves, and the other was on a bus on her way to do mission work in San Antonio. I wasn't best friends with either one. I knew who they were and they knew me. We never hung out after school or on weekends, but it was always good to see their face in the hallway every once and a while. I hate that I never got to tell either one of them goodbye, and I hate that I didn't know their story. I found out months later that I was related to Samantha through a series of marriages, and knowing that makes me regret not attempting to know her better. Even though I could not remember what Anabel looked like, it still hurt to hear my friend say that she passed in an accident.

If you're reading this, I just want you to know that I love you and always will. If you pass from this earth while I am alive, I will grieve for our loss, and I will make plans to attend the funeral, where I can truly tell you goodbye. If I die, and you still live, I can only ask that you do the same. I may want you to be the winner of the Nobel Peace Prize or I may want you to be chopped up and fed to the fishes, but either way, you have made a difference in my life, and that difference has shaped me into the person I am today. Without you, I wouldn't be me. I can hope that without me, you wouldn't be you.

Death is a hard concept to understand. How can you cry for someone who is lost, but have joy that they are in a better place? Should you not be happy that they have escaped the misery of this world, and hope that they continue to live in another life? We cry, not because we are hurt, but because we do not understand what happens when we die. As a Christian, I believe that there is a better place, a place where life continues as if nothing happened. But I can only be as sure as my faith will take me. In the end, it will take death to truly understand death; just as it takes life to truly understand life. Before life, you had no idea what life was. And now, you do. After death, you have no idea what death is. We all will face the music one day, and some days the music plays with a little more crescendo and a little more speed, growing to the most exciting part of the piece. For some pieces, the music ends there. You never want it to end, you want the music to grow louder and louder, until it pierces your soul and draws you in. And in some pieces, everything ends in a decrescendo. A quiet, relaxing escape, one that puts me to sleep almost every time. No matter what, when all is said and done, the audience will stand up and applaud. They applaud the efforts of the orchestra, they applaud the conductor, who led them to the finale, and they applaud the author of the piece. When you pass, they applaud you. They applaud your efforts, they applaud your teachers and friends and mentors, but most of all, they applaud you.

"If I ever leave this world alive, I'll thank ya' for all the things you did in my life." - Rest in Peace Anabel, Samantha, Tom, MomMom, Gus, Christi, Michael, Clifton, Annie.

Econo...WHAT?

I feel as though I have to take these early days of blogging to catch everyone up to where I am...

I like my classes like I like my Vodka Martini: Shaken, Not Stirred
Obviously, certain courses will be accepted as transfer credit from Bond to Tech. From what I understand, it has to be approved by the dean here to count as a replacement for a course over there...whatever. So I picked the eight courses I was interested in, and sent them on their way. No so easy...

I chose to take:
Fundamentals of Finance
Markets and Corporate "Behaviour"
Organizational Management
Strategic Marketing

Anybody know how the markets are doing today?
Apparently, Australia is a little more advanced in their higher education, because in order to take their Finance course, you have to take a class called, "Econometrics."
Not a big deal, right? Wrong.


Econometrics, aka Eco 4305 <-That's senior level right there folks, as told by Raiderlink, is the "Application of linear regression analysis including simple statistics, probability, distributions, hypothesis testing, and linear regression" Basically, Economic Calculus. I don't mind Calculus, so that's cool, but I can't stand economics. So depending on the ratio of Calculus to Economics, I will either excel or flounder.

But, as it stands, my current choices are now...

Fundamentals of Finance
Econometrics (uggh)
Organizational Management
Strategic Marketing

Apparently that'll have to change as well, but I haven't gotten there yet. On the bright side, I got a scholarship notification today, so yay for sources of funding!

"Do you come from a land down under?"

I finally decided to re-spark this account that I made Senior year in high school. Originally it was used to post my opinion on current political topics. Now, I've chosen to restart, this time not for a grade, but as a small window into my fast and furious life, soon to be "2 Fast 2 Furious." (I have a friend who loves those movies, so that was for her).

My Life Down Under

I am almost done with the fall semester of my Sophomore year, studying Marketing and Management with a Math minor. I work full time. I am a mentor in the Honors College, a member of the Tech Activities Board, and highly involved at church. I love everything I do, and I do it because I love it. This past spring, I had a small pang of regret for not going to the University of Virgina, but my time on TAB started kicking off, and that regret went away immediately. Then fall arrived, and I had the ability to meet new faces in the Honors College, mentoring them through their first semester at Tech. I have formed many new relationships at Tech, and I feel it was the best move for me to stay here. This semester has been a little rough, grade-wise, I'm facing a few more Bs than I'm used to, but a friend once told me, "People come in and ace their first three years, then get their first failing grade senior year, and it absolutely crushes them. So don't freak out, we want you to pass, and learn everything you can along the way." So I've taken that approach, and I feel as though it has opened my mind to the topic being taught, but it has also broadened my relationships with my peers. But, I am about to leave my Quantum of Solace for A View to Kill.


Bond, James Bond
I was highly encouraged to consider studying abroad when I came to Tech. When I finally sat down I found out that the options for MKT/MGT majors were: Cairo, Germany, Dubai, and Australia. I've always been interested in Australia, so after hearing that, I didn't consider any other option. I chose Bond University (www.bond.edu.au) a top notch university in Gold Coast, boasting small class sizes, and a very intimate culture. Of course, costs are ridiculous, so I've been running around applying for scholarships and finding funding here and there. There are still three applications I won't hear back from until December, so keep your fingers crossed! Tentative departure is right around New Years, and I'll keep you posted about that as well.

I'll try to update this more when I'm there, but I just wanted to kick it off with a small introduction. A lot of people have asked if I'm going to keep a blog, so to you, the answer is yes. I will, God willing, have access to Skype while I'm over there, and that information will come in a later post.